


Welcome To Burlesque

by urdadcallsmekatya



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Burlesque AU, F/F, Fluff, Light Angst, Smut, burlesque dancer katya, waitress trixie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-28
Updated: 2017-09-16
Packaged: 2018-12-21 03:04:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11934999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/urdadcallsmekatya/pseuds/urdadcallsmekatya
Summary: Katya's a burlesque dancer Trixie is the young waitress with a crush on her





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This does have a couple of references to the movie but nothing major. I just needed some burlesque dancer Katya in my life.
> 
> come say hi @ urdadcallsmekatya on tumblr

To say her step father had taken her coming out badly was the understatement of the century, he had somehow managed to yell every slur and profanity at her he could think of not to mention the worst of part of it. Her mother sat there and watched. With him having stormed out the front door with a yell to her mom to ‘deal with the dyke’ her mom finally decided to say something, unfortunately for Trixie it wasn’t her coming to her defence.

“Beatrice he’s right, we don’t condone this-” her mom started with the the first words she had spoken in an hour then paused with a sigh leaning her head on her hand as she continued “ “this uh lifestyle.. choice you’ve decided to make. I think it’s best for you to go get your things and leave. Far away!” 10am and she had been kicked out of her house, brilliant.

Swiftly turning with tears in her eyes as the person who she had been closest to throughout her life told her to leave she ran up the stairs. Once safely behind her bedroom door sliding down it to sit with her head in her knees tears down her cheeks, she had no idea what she was going to do now. Lucky for her as a 22 year old who spent most of their time inside trying to figure out what to do with the rest of their life, whilst occasionally waitressing at a local diner she had quite a bit of money saved up. Well enough to get her a ticket out of Milwaukee and hopefully a motel room until she found a job.

Gathering the necessary things she needed, some clothes the small amount of makeup she had and her toiletries, haphazardly throwing them into her pink suitcase and hoping she hadn’t missed anything. She grabbed her bag with her purse and whatever money she had lying around stuffed into it swinging it over her shoulder while pulling her suitcase behind and made her way downstairs towards the door. Her step dad's wallet was lying next to where they all kept their house keys she took it from the table putting it in her purse as one final fuck you and left.

Dragging her suitcase along the streets in the rain while being technically homeless to an airport having no idea where to go was never going to be a particularly pleasant experience. Deciding she would just buy a ticket for the next flight that was leaving just wanting to get as far away from this shitty place as soon as possible is how she ended up 45 minutes later on a flight to L.A.

The flight was hell. How some bratty kid had managed to scream for hours on end she had no idea, to be truthful she was impressed that she could say she hadn’t killed a kid. Sat there with nothing to do for a few hours Trixie had no choice but to think about what had happened with tears gathering in her eyes trying not to let them fall. She refused to cry here not on a flight not next to the slightly overweight man who didn’t smell the best no she would wait until later. She’d wait until she was sat on a uncomfortable bed in a dingy motel room before she let herself be consumed by the feeling of betrayal her mom had caused by throwing her out. She wouldn’t think about it, she would try to focus on the good things that could happen in L.A. If only she had managed to do that. 

Feeling a huge weight lifted from her shoulders as she stepped off of the plane only to have the thought dawn on her that she now had nowhere to go whilst she was in a completely new place. After the tedious ordeal of going through customs and finding her bag she’d found herself stood outside LAX, her mood improving at the knowledge that her mom and stepdad were on the other side of the country, also finally it wasn’t raining. Walking over to an empty cab and opening the passenger side door, she greeted by a short and slightly sweaty man looking at her expectantly to tell her where she wanted to go.

“I’m looking for a motel, Could you take me to the closest one please?” she tried to remain polite finding it difficult as the cab driver's eyes went down to stare at the cleavage that appeared where the pink bardot shirt she had chosen that morning ended as she leant forward. The expression in his eyes turning vulgar sent a shiver down Trixie’s spine as she dreaded the journey to come hoping that there was a motel close by.

“Put your bags in the backseat and get in there’s one around half an hour away.” turning around she could practically feel the eyes trail down to her ass she tried to ignore it, thankful that she’d be momentarily away from his gaze as she listed her suitcase into the back seat of the cab. Being in the cab was a nerve wracking experience for Trixie but the drive didn’t take too long the surprising lack of traffic was a relief as the cab pulled up to a rather dreary looking motel.

The outside of the building was a dirty and painted off white it looked to be a fairly old building and she highly doubted they had many people staying there, it was probably lucky for them that this was the best Trixie could afford. She was pulled out of her thoughts by the cab driver clearing his throat and holding his hand out expectantly, without thinking she just handed him a $20 bill from her purse not thinking to ask how much he wanted before getting out of the cab and walking towards the motel. 

Her room was in the nicest way possible disgusting. From the wallpaper that peeled off the walls in most places to the rough and dated red carpet that clashed with the almost yellow colour of the walls that at some point were probably cream. Leaving her suitcase by the door and making a beeline for the bed Trixie curled herself up on top of the uncomfortable mattress slowly drifting into a dreamless sleep.

The unfamiliar surroundings as Trixie woke startled her for a moment before unfortunately realising where she was. Looking over to see her phone on the floor having knocked it off the bed while sleeping she picked it up glancing at the time. It now being around 8:30 with no chance of her sleeping through the night after napping her choices were either to sit wallowing in self pity in a motel room until she passed out in the early hours of the morning. Or she could go out and find somewhere to get completely wasted and maybe even find a girl to eat her out in the bathroom of a bar, just in the interest of lightening her mood. One of those sounded a lot better than the other.

The bathroom was somehow in an even worse condition to the other room as she stood leaning against the sink applying her makeup, blessed by her clear skin she never needed to wear much. Tonight however she added what others might of thought as an excessive amount of eyeliner but she knew it framed her eyes well then finishing it all up with her favourite pink lip colour.

Going back to find the only outfit she had brought with her that would suffice for the plans she had for the night silently thanking herself for packing it earlier. Checking her outfit in the mirror making sure her curves were visible in the short baby pink silk dress. It stopped slightly below her ass and clung tightly onto her hips and waist while showing an obscene amount of cleavage. Perfect. Then when she had somewhat tamed her platinum blonde curls and matched a pair of white pumps to her outfit she was out into the streets of L.A. 

In hindsight Trixie probably should of gotten some kind of idea of where she could go from the woman who owned the motel. That would of been a clever idea though, and no part of this plan was clever. So there she was wandering around the streets to stubborn to just try and get back to the motel before she ended up lost. 

Trixie got lost. Finally admitting to herself that this was in no way a good idea when she had found herself stood outside a burlesque club, against all better judgement she stepped inside.

An unfamiliar song was playing as Trixie entered the almost full club. Feeling like she needed a drink more than anything she made her way towards the bar, that was until she saw the woman in the centre of the stage. Stood frozen in place her jaw dropped as her eyes stayed on who could only be described as the hottest woman Trixie had ever encountered. The energy she gave off into the club was almost domineering as other girls danced around her. Their outfits were nothing special compared to hers, yes they looked hot in the black lace bras and panties the sheer thigh highs had lace trims at the top of them where they were connected a simple black garter belt. But this was nothing compared to the woman wearing a black and white patterned corset she also had the same black panties and thigh highs however her garter belt had intricate lace. But all of them wore the same pair of black stilettos, Trixie felt weak at the knees.

She was entranced watching her all she had to do was slightly sway her hips and Trixie was done for she didn't think it could get worse, that was until she looked her dead in the eye. The cherry on top being that she lowered herself painfully slowly into a split never breaking the eye contact as she sucked her cheeks in slightly making her cheekbones even more pronounced. As she reached the floor she mouthed the next line still staring at Trixie ‘if you’ve got a little extra well give it to the band.’ She was smirking right at her like she knew exactly what she was doing to Trixie, and she's sure that she did know, with a wink she swung her legs round out of her split and stood back towards the crowd. Trixie’s eyes laser focused to her perky ass swaying from side to side as she moved to another place on the stage.

Finally managing to get herself to the bar and ordering herself a definitely overpriced drink for someone staying in a motel her attention was brought back to the dancers. One of the other girls started to lean forward right in the centre as the other woman came up behind her ‘behave yourself said Georgia’ the woman tapped her on the ass. God, Trixie wanted to be up there with her. She hadn’t even realised that she had blurted out her wishes to work at the club to the bartender.

“How does someone get up there?” her face turned red after she realised what she’d done. 

“Up there? Sweetie do I look like I hire people to you? It’s Katya you’ll be wanting to ask about that.” the words probably would of sounded rude if he hadn’t laughed at her bright red cheeks. He was clearly pleased he’d managed to wind her up a bit.

“So where would I find Katya then?” 

“Stick around until after the show, it shouldn’t be too difficult for you with the way you’ve been staring at her since you got here.”

Was she really that obvious with her staring? She didn’t think too much about it but that was probably helped by Katya's return to the stage. This time she was alone and Trixie couldn’t wait to focus all her attention on the gorgeous woman again. The thought of talking to Katya when she was done sent a rush of nerves through her body but that hadn't lasted long as she started to dance again.

Trixie was sad to see the show end after watching different dancers come on in awe of the way they could move their bodies. None having quite stood out the way Katya had. She had almost convinced herself not to go backstage to see Katya yet she couldn’t bring herself to walk away without trying to get a job here or to deprive herself of hearing the woman's voice. Spotting her over in the corner by a rack of costumes and shortly realising she probably shouldn't have tapped her on the shoulder from behind when Katya had jumped and whipped her head round.

“Sorry but are you Katya? I’m Trixie, Trixie Mattel I was told to find you about a job here.” 

“Yekaterina Petrovna Zamolodchikova-” Trixie’s jaw dropped for the second time that night “But yes darling you can call me Katya, as for a job I suppose we could use another waitress especially for someone as stunning as you.” her eyes glanced down for a moment but for some reason Trixie wasn’t uncomfortable, in fact she was flattered to have the attention from Katya. Who had started to walk past Trixie back towards the main part of the club before she turned around.

“Oh and Trixie close your mouth before you start catching flies, you start tomorrow don’t be late.” Trixie had quickly shut her mouth for a moment before she went to reply.

“Yes ma’am i’ll be here.”

“And don’t ever call me ma’am again.” she called as she left Trixie stood there wondering what had just happened.

~

“Trixie you’re doing it again!” The bartender, who she’d learnt was called Dan, pointed out as she stood there with a tray of drinks in her hand eyes fixed on Katya. 

“Shit i’m sorry, but in my defence I don't do it all the time.” Trixie knew that it was the biggest amount of crap that had left her mouth since the time she tried to say she was straight. It was hard not to stare at Katya as she danced on stage in outfits that only covered what was necessary, it was especially hard when she’d stare right at her and Trixie would nearly drop the drinks she was carrying at the time. She never talked to Katya as much as she would love to she couldn’t say she wasn't intimidated by the older woman. Trixie couldn’t tell you much about her other than her name and the fact she owned the place. Once her number had ended and Trixie had gone to take the tray back to the bar Dan handed her a bottle of water.

“Take this to her she’ll be in her office, and for god sake Trixie talk to her!” It was easier said than done every time she saw Katya throw her head back laughing,more like wheezing, at something flashing her perfect teeth Trixie felt waves of affection for her. For someone who could endlessly tease Trixie whether she was trying to or not, for someone who’s gaze made Trixie want to fall to her knees in front of her Katya seemed like the most carefree person Trixie had come across. 

Being alone around Katya made Trixie nervous from their first encounter Trixie realised how quick witted she was, she both loved and hated that. Part of her thinks the only reason she had agreed to go to her office was that she didn’t know if she would be able to handle the shit she’d get from Dan about it. As much as Dan liked to torment her about her little crush on Katya they had quickly become close in the 2 weeks she’d been working at the club. It never occurred to her that she probably should've knocked on Katya’s office door before entering.

“Ah Tracy it’s you, quick question ever heard of knocking?” Trixie’s face dropped while Katya started to laugh, showing that she was in fact joking a look of relief now starting to show. “I’m sorry for messing with you but it’s cute watching you get flustered.” 

“Well i’m glad it amuses you so much, anyway brought you this.” she held out the bottle of water as she perched on the edge of the desk Katya sat behind. 

“Trixie Mattel, you are an actual angel!” She exclaimed grabbing the bottle from her and drinking half the thing in one “It’s not easy to be the sweatiest woman in show business, I must do my duty though really i’m like a slave.” she had managed to keep up the serious look on her face for about 10 seconds before both of them completely lost it laughing. 

“How long have you been dancing? Trixie asked once they had both calmed down.

“I’ve been doing it since I was 23 maybe 24 I only bought the club recently though, it was sort of a im 37 what am I doing with my life decision.” 

“Well it worked out the clubs great!” Trixie mentally kicked herself for sounding a little over enthusiastic as they both went quiet. She couldn’t help it though Katya made her feel like she was a blushing virgin with just one look. If there was one thing she wasn’t that was it, She’d had her fair share of hookups and liked to think she was at least somewhat experienced yet one look from Katya and she felt 16 again.

“What brought you to L.A. then specifically into my club?” Finally one of them broke the silence that probably only lasted a few seconds but it felt like eternity to Trixie. 

“A long story… probably best to leave it for another day.” the atmosphere in the room had gotten so tense Trixie felt like a complete idiot, somehow incapable of just making up a reason. No she had to go and make it awkward.

“It’s getting late i’m guessing you’re going to want to head home now don't let me keep you,” the soft smile on Katya’s face made her heart ache. “It was nice to talk to you though Trix i’ll see you tomorrow.” The nickname had sent a blush to Trixie’s cheeks as did the small noise she let out when she was suddenly pulled into a hug. Realising it was Katya hugging her, and that Dan was right she did go completely out of it thinking about her, she wrapped her arms around the older woman's waist who hugged her just a bit tighter before letting go. 

“Yea i’ll see you tomorrow Kat.” Trixie never realised the nickname she had let slip out.

~

Trixie spent most nights still laying in the uncomfortable motel room 3 months later, but even that couldn’t bring down her mood as she thought about a certain burlesque dancer. The two of them had gotten close every night when Katya had finished all her numbers Trixie would bring her bottles of water and they’d talk about anything and everything. Except one thing neither of them ever brought up the subject of why Trixie had come to L.A. in the first place. After the first time they had developed and unspoken agreement that they wouldn’t speak or it, well not until Trixie brought it up. 

“If it isn’t the undiscovered celebrity Tallulah! Here to bring me my water like and acting like the common folk, however do you cope?” 

“Careful Katie not too excited now wouldn’t want you to throw out your back, you still have to writhe around on stage for a living.” The witty comments they made were one of Trixie’s favourite things, she loved seeing the goofy side to the woman who she was sure would be the death her. And to be honest it was a nice break from the tension that was often there after all the flirty comments the two made. Trixie wished she knew if Katya was joking but that's never something she could ask, what would she even say? She couldn’t stand there and say ‘are you being serious when you make stupid flirty comments cause ever since I saw you dance i’ve wanted you to fuck me till you can’t anymore’ she thought not.

“Coming for my lifestyle now Tracy? I would pay to see you try to do it.” She winked as she said it, guess we’re back to flirting then. The idea that suddenly came into Trixie’s head was golden if there was any way to seduce a hot older burlesque dancer this was it. 

“Well then maybe you’ll have to teach me one day.” She hoped Katya knew she was being serious, Trixie knew she could be a tease she had the curves to drive someone crazy. She’d be damned if she didn’t at least try to use them to her advantage with Katya.

“Well if that's the case then what are you doing tomorrow?” 

~

Trixie arrived at the club the next morning just before 11am, wishing she’d had a bit more sleep than she had, seeing Katya sat with her back towards the the entrance legs spread wide leaning right forward. She looked good sat there with a pair of short black shorts and sports bra her outfit similar to Trixie who instead wore a pair of pink tight fitting yoga pants. She looked good, she knew Katya would be staring at her ass and thighs in these. She knew what she was doing, knew that Katya would never miss an opportunity to look at her ass. Especially since she had not so subtly was looking at her tits in the dress she wore when they had met.

“Tracy how long do you plan to stand over there?” How had she known she was there she had her back towards her. As soon as Trixie had started to come up with some feeble excuse she was cut off. “It’s alright I heard the door open a minute ago. Come over here and we can get you warmed up a bit and get started.” She left her back by the entrance and moved up to the stage where Katya had moved to sit cross legged and pulled Trixie down to sit in front of her.

The moment Katya kneeled in front of Trixie and started to move her legs into certain positions Trixie knew she was fucked. Having Katya help her stretch was truly the longest 20 minutes of her life but she wished it hadn’t ended. She loved that Katya could’ve just told her what to do maybe demonstrated it but no, she had her hands on Trixie the whole time. She couldn’t stop her mind from running when Katya had spread her legs moving them into the position she had seen Katya in when she had arrived. She wished that her hands hadn’t left her thighs to hold onto Trixie’s arms and pull her forward slightly. She imagined Katya spreading her legs in a slightly different situation involving a lot less clothing. The way her hands would move so calmly and steadily down her body, the control she would have as she spread Trixie’s thighs painfully slowly. She wanted to feel Katya kissing up her thighs she wanted her to tease until Trixie was shaking only then letting her have what she wanted.

“Trixie! Are you alright you’ve gone awfully quiet?” 

“Oh yea i’m fine. Do you know which of the numbers you’re gonna teach me?” Trixie hoped that by asking Katya would move onto that because she wasn’t sure how much longer she could take having her hands all over her thighs in particular. 

“I was thinking express if that’s okay with you? It’s simple yet still incredibly sexy so a nice one to start with I think.” Katya moved to pull two chairs to the middle of the stage from where they were sat at the side, Trixie wondered how much thought she put into what number she’d teach her before Trixie arrived. “So maybe if we break this down into a few sections i’ll show you each bit first so you get an idea, then I can help you through each bit.” Little did Katya know that she probably already knew the entire number from how much she watched her on stage.

“Yea that sounds like a plan. I already have some idea of how this goes anyway.” Should she of admitted that? Trixie had no idea but she’d done it now so there was no going back. 

Katya moved to sit in one of the chairs. “So the start of this one is more open to what you want to do, the best way to think about it is probably to imagine trying to work someone up. You’ve gotta enjoy the power that burlesque dancing gives you otherwise you’ll get nowhere.” She pressed play on a remote Trixie didn’t even realise she was holding and the track began to play. For the first part Katya was barely moving much as she lip synced to the song, the most she did was lean back over the chair one of her hands coming up to move slowly down her body stopping just at the bottom of her stomach. She started to lean up again ‘it’s a life’ she whipped her head to the side and then back to face the front ‘it’s a style’ one of her legs moved to cross over the other ‘it’s a need it’s burlesque.’ Katya then stood and walked slowly around the chair swaying her hips as she turned it around slowly straddling it as she began to click her fingers to the music. She then grabbed the remote pausing the music. 

“Let's hope if I say that it looks easy enough so far i don’t make a complete fool of myself.” She had watched Katya so intently that she could fairly confidently say she knew what to do. 

“Well then Tracy show me what you’ve got.” Trixie moved to sit the same way Katya had while she was fiddling around with the buttons on the remote that controlled the music. “You ready?” Trixie nodded and Katya hit play the music started and Trixie was ready to put her plan into action. She took advantage of any opportunity she had to sway her ass a bit more or to subtly try and push her boobs up showing off her cleavage. She had managed to almost perfectly copy what Katya had done before her turns out constant staring pays off well. 

“Wow, I mean there are a few moves that could be sharpened up a bit but are you sure you haven’t done this before?” 

The two of them carried on running through different sections getting them perfect it took them around an hour to get a minute and a half into the song. Katya’s words of praise were slowly driving her insane she loved it when she told her how good she was doing the choreography and how well she was picking it up. When they got to her favourite part of the song she was ready to make her final and strongest attempt at seducing Katya. After Katya had demonstrated it and Trixie had tried to not stare completely at her bent down hand placed on the seat, she failed, it was Trixie’s turn. When the music played she started deliberately moving her hips completely out of time with it until Katya paused it and walked up behind her still leaning over the chair.

“Do you mind if i help with this? You’re completely out of time.” She asked as one hand moved to grab Trixie’s hip.

“Not at all.” She started the music again reaching around Trixie to put the remote down on the chair and then moving it to Trixie’s hip and began to move her hips in time. Trixie tried pushing her ass out back towards Katya as her grip on her hips got tighter. She tried not to whine when one of Katya’s hands moved to pause the music but her grip with the other only got tighter. Throwing the remote down somewhere on the floor as she moved closer towards her and leaning down over Trixie, using her free hand to brush Trixie’s hair over her shoulder and pressed a lingering kiss to her neck as she pulled back slightly whispering in her ear.

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing baby.” The involuntary moan Trixie let out was loud as Katya’s presence behind her disappeared, she felt like her knees would give out any second as she stood up and turned around to see Katya by the side of the stage. Trixie walked, more like stumbled, over to her the arousal she had been feeling since she arrived now painfully apparent. 

“Kat, please.” She didn’t know what she wanted more, if she wanted Katya to push her down to her knees hold her in place by her hair as she ate her out. Or if she wanted to go back to Katya’s apartment with her and get fucked good and hard while spread out on the older womans bed. 

Katya pulled her by the arm and pushed her up against the wall, Trixie barely realising what was happening as she felt two hands pulling her in for what was turning out to be the hottest kiss Trixie had ever experienced. Her mind finally caught up with her as she wrapped her arms around Katya’s waist so she was pressed tight against her body. Even though she was taller than her Katya’s touch made her feel small as she moved one of her hands down Trixie’s body she gasped as she felt one of Katya’s hands hovering over the sports bra she was wearing but not fully touching her. She really knew how to tease Trixie and god did that turn her on. Katya’s kisses then moved down to her neck she let her head fall back against the wall whimpering as she started to slowly nip at her neck. 

“God, please Katya I need you.” Trixie didn’t care about if her desperation came off as embarrassing anymore she hadn’t ever wanted someone as much as she did Katya.

“We can’t do this here doll, my car's outside come on we can go back to mine.” Katya felt herself be pulled back closer to Trixie, who was whining at the thought of having to wait any longer, when she tried to move away. “Don’t whine baby, you could wait earlier when you were teasing me so you can wait until we get to my apartment.” The tone in Katya’s voice ws one Trixie had been dying to hear, she loved that she was taking control of the entire situation. Taking her hand Katya lead her out of the club and towards her car as Trixie climbed in the passenger seat all she could do was wait for Katya to drive them back to hers. 

“Please tell me you don’t live far away.” 

“It’s only about 10 minutes, be patient.” Katya put one hand on her thigh as she started the car. “Oh and Trixie, it’s cute when you’re desperate.” she said with a wink taking her hand from Trixie’s thigh after giving it a small squeeze and started to drive away from the club.

The moment they were inside Katya’s lips were immediately on hers, she clearly knew the place well as she walked Trixie towards her bedroom never breaking them apart. Her legs hit the bed as she fell backwards pulling Katya down with her the kiss broke for a second before Katya was back biting at her bottom lip and running her hands down her sides and back up slipping her fingers under her sports bra for a moment. 

“Sit up lemme get this off you.” Once she had gotten it off of her and thrown it to some random corner of the room she pushed Trixie and stayed straddling her as she looked down at her. Pushing a stray lock of hair from Trixie’s face she whispered “You are so fucking beautiful Trix.” Trixie blushed as Katya leaned down to kiss from her neck down to her breasts taking her right nipple into her mouth while rolling the left between two of her fingers. Trixie kept trying to keep her whines silent as she moved one of her hands into Katya’s hair and the other to grip the sheet. 

“Please Katya I can’t with all the teasing.” Katya ignored her but started to move down her body running her hands over the small tummy Trixie had pressing light kisses into her skin. She hooked two of her fingers in Trixie’s yoga pants on each side pulling them down to reveal the thighs Katya had been non stop thinking about since she had met the younger girl. The pink lace thong she was wearing was cutting into her hips the sight practically making Katya drool as she sat up pulling her own shorts and sports bra off. She moved back to straddle, who was practically squirming under her.

“What do you want baby? I can’t read your mind.” Katya was slowly grinding down on her as she asked.

“Just wanna make you feel good.” She closed her eyes as she admitted to what she’d been thinking about since she’d met Katya this was her opportunity to get her head between her strong thighs feel her hands tugging at her hair and she wasn’t going to wait any longer, Katya flipped them both over. With Trixie now on top she pulled down the lacy black boyshorts Katya had on as she got in between her legs kissing up her thighs leaving light nips every so often. That was when Katya took a fistfull of her hair pulling Trixie’s head up to look her in the eye.

“If you wanted to make me feel good baby then you should know better than to be a little tease!” Her head then being pushed down to where Katya needed her. Wrapping her arms around her thighs and burying her face into Katya’s pussy, Trixie moaned at the gasp that left her mouth when Trixie’s tongue finally made contact with her clit. As Trixie swirled her tongue around her clit she felt the hands in her hair get tighter. “Come on baby, more.” Trixie lapped at her clit a bit more before moving her tongue down to fuck Katya “Yea that’s it-” two of Trixie’s fingers then moved to rub circles into her clit “God, yes Trixie feels so good. You’re doing so good sweetheart, so good.” Trixie whined at the praise picking up her speed as Katya’s hips moved in time with her, she knew it wouldn’t be long until Katya came considering how worked up they both were. “Trix, baby i’m gonna!” Her thighs shook, eyes tight shut and one hand flying up to grab the pillow next to her head as Trixie licked her through the aftershocks of orgasm. 

Trixie looked up at her she’d never seen Katya look so stunning, even when she was dancing nothing compared to this. “Come on doll, lie back it’s your turn now.” Laying down on Katya’s bed with her between her legs and an obvious wet patch on her panties is all she had hoped for when she set out for the club that morning, not that she thought she’d get it. “So wet baby-” Katya lightly ran a finger up and down the front of her panties before rubbing her clit through the material.

“Please, please Katya. I need more please give me more, i’m so wet all for you. Just please.” Trixie begged as she squirmed and whined spread out for Katya ready for whatever she would give her. 

“That’s what I like to hear.” And with that she pulled down Trixie’s panties kissing her hips and thighs so that it took Trixie by surprise when she felt two fingers filling her up. Her back arching up off of the bed, letting out a stream of moans as Katya’s fingers pumped in and out of her. She could barely form coherent thought as she was being fucked good into complete ecstasy, the only things leaving her lips being gasps and moans with the odd mumble of Katya’s name. The moment Katya moves down to lick over her clit and then sucks as she pulls her fingers out of Trixie she’s comes hard, harder than she ever had before. It had taken her a minute to figure out that she had in fact squirted as she saw Katya wipe her hand off on the damp sheets. 

She was so fucked out that she could barely move her body as her eyes started to drift shut, they opened again as she felt herself being pulled into Katya’s body. “Shh you did so good baby, go to sleep we’ll clean up later.” The feeling of finally being in a comfortable bed along with Katya running her fingers through her hair meant it didn’t take long for Trixie to drift into sleep with a light kiss on her forehead.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> im sorry but this is just angst cause i have no self restraint

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come say hi @urdadcallsmekatya on tumblr

Waking up in Katya’s arms was the most relaxed Trixie had felt in so long, her arms had stayed tightly wrapped around her waist the entire night. Trixie had woken up multiple times she’d never been able to sleep in unfamiliar places since she was just a kid, She felt a little nervous that her restlessness would wake up Katya but she just seem sleep through Trixie moving around in her arms and leaving small kisses on her skin. Trixie didn’t think Katya could get more beautiful yet every time she caught a glimpse of her she realised that she could.

Trixie thought about what had happened the night before, it was the best sex she had ever had yet the only problem was she wasn’t entirely sure what Katya wanted from her. She didn’t know what this thing between them was, it could be anything really she just hoped that it was something. It had to be something right? Katya wouldn’t of let her stay the night after they had woken up from their nap in the late afternoon, she wouldn’t of ordered them both pizza for dinner, let Trixie sit half on her lap after turning on some stupid Jodie Foster movie if they were nothing. Right?

“Trix, come on wake up.” Trixie felt herself being shaken gently as she groaned moving her body even closer to Katya. “Baby I really need to get up, i’ve gotta find out from Pearl if the show went alright last night. Since you know I was a little too busy to be there.” She reached one of her hands down to squeeze Trixie's ass, she couldn’t stop the strong blush that spread over her cheeks as Katya kissed the tip of her nose and walked out of the room. They were definitely something.

Trixie buried her face back into the sheets, she could hear Katya laughing over the phone to Pearl so she guessed that everything had gone smoothly with the show despite her not being there. She knew how much Katya worried about her club she was so passionate about it Trixie had admired that since she met her, she wished she had half the amount of love for her job as Katya did. Sure it was great working at the club she got to gawk at Katya writhing around on stage most nights, but being a waitress was never really a pleasant job, the drinks that were spilled down her and the men who made comments made Trixie feel sick to her stomach. She easily calmed down when she locked eyes with Katya on stage and thought about how she could go and sit in her office with her after she had finished, now though she hoped that she’d get to see her outside of that little office in her burlesque club. She hoped that she’d be able to get dressed up and explore the city with Katya after convincing her that yes everything would cope at the club if she wasn’t there one night.

She begrudgingly got out from between the warm sheets her nipples hardening as the cool air hit her bare skin, Trixie decided it would be fine to try and find a shirt or something to wear from Katya's closet. Hung up at one end were all of Katya's burlesque outfits most of them not being much more than just lingerie, momentarily forgetting about the shirt she looked through the different sets. She couldn’t say her thoughts were entirely innocent as she imagined herself laying on Katya's bed as she danced for her in a skimpy black bra and thong that covered the bare minimum. She imagined slipping her hands down the front of her panties and starting to slowly rub circles on her clit as she was almost dripping onto the sheets.

“See anything you like in there?” She was pulled from her thoughts by Katya's voice making her jump and let go of the red corset she currently had in her hand. She was suddenly aware that she was still completely naked as Katya walked over to her wrapping her arm around her waist as she pulled a long white shirt out of the closet. “This should fit you, but first come shower babe,” she felt Katya pulling her by the wrist towards the bathroom. The shower was conveniently tiny, she enjoyed being pushed up against Katya as she washed her hair for her.

“This showers really not big enough for the both of us is it?” Trixie giggled as she held onto Katya's hips while she rubbed shampoo into her hair, her eyes closing at the feeling of Katya's hands in her hair massaging it in.

“No it’s not, altho I think it may have something to do with the fact your huge ass is in here.” She smirked taking a hand from Trixie's hair playfully smacking her ass, she probably had a shampoo hand mark there for a moment but it was quickly washed away by the water.

“You’re a cunt!”

“I’m your favourite cunt though Tracy don’t deny it. Come on, head back lemme get this out.” Katya started to run her fingers through Trixie's hair under the warm water washing out the remains of shampoo, it was hard for her to stay under the water wanting to lean into Katya's touch. She loved the feeling of having Katya's hands in her hair she’d always found it soothing to have someone playing with it, ever since she was a kid it had calmed her down. Her mom used to lay with her on the couch and Trixie would lay her head in her lap as they would watch disney movies and her mom would twirl locks of her curly hair around her finger.

She had zoned out completely thinking about her mom when she felt herself being pulled in towards Katya, she hadn’t even felt the conditioner being put in her hair she didn’t even notice the tears collecting in her eyes.

“Trix, hey are you crying? What’s up sugarbutt?” Trixie just shook her head against Katya's chest she didn’t trust herself to speak yet and she was praying that Katya understood that. She wanted to stay here in this moment with Katya, a little less sad, but she wanted to feel this safe always in her life. She had come to terms with the fact that it would never happen but she would like to stay for as long as she could, as she tried to stop her tears from falling.

“Shhh baby you’re alright, i’ve got you.” Katya's hands were rubbing her back trying to calm her down whilst avoiding her hair which seemed to soothe her she had gone down to a point where she was just letting out small sniffles as Katya rocked them back and forth. She walked her back slightly so that her hair was now back under the water, she wanted to get them both out of there back into her bed so she could find out what was going on with Trixie.

“Kat m’sorry,” she mumbled her voice wavering slightly.

“Don’t be silly,” Katya continued to help wash the water through her hair. “Let’s get this washed out then we can go lie down okay? Or if you want I can drive you back to yours.” She couldn’t help but think she had done something wrong as she somehow saw Trixie's face drop even more, maybe Trixie had regretted sleeping with her. Why Trixie wanted a smoking burlesque dancer verging on 40, who also happened to be her boss she didn’t know.

Neither of them spoke after that, Katya had pulled Trixie out of the shower wrapping towels around both of them kissing her shoulders, chest and tummy or really just wherever she could as she dried Trixie off so she could pull the large shirt on over her head. She was getting worried she had never seen Trixie like this, she was almost emotionless her face and the way she was carrying herself just made her appear like she was completely numb. It wasn’t exactly what she was expecting for a morning after, she didn’t know if Trixie would stay or not but she certainly didn’t think she would end up having to face Trixie clearly so distressed.

Trixie clung onto her like her life depended on it, they were back in Katya's bed the moment they had gotten in Trixie had wrapped herself around Katya. The entire right side of her body was somehow pressed against Katya as she desperately tried to get closer to someone who cared about her. Katya couldn’t care less about the wet patch on her shirt that was probably there from Trixie's still damp hair, neither did she care how hot it was under the sheets with Trixie so close. She just wanted to find a way to ask her what was going on, she didn’t want to drive her away by being to invasive but she couldn’t help the sick feeling in her stomach seeing Trixie like this.

“Trix what’s wrong, talk to me baby.” She was talking so quietly she wasn’t sure if Trixie would even hear her, it almost felt as if she was approaching a startled animal like she was afraid Trixie would burst into tears again. She’d only seen her cry in the shower not even half an hour ago and she was sure it was the worst she’d ever felt, seeing Trixie like this was unnatural she was used to her being her confident and too sassy for her own good self. Her being so clearly distressed and vulnerable unnerved Katya, she honestly couldn’t tell if she was running her hands through Trixie's hair to try to calm Trixie or herself at this point.

She considered asking Trixie what was wrong again after her not replying for a minute but felt like eternity, maybe she really didn’t hear her. But Trixie then just shook her head, she probably wouldn’t of noticed if she wasn’t paying such close attention to her.

“Trixie. Please. I’m worried about you.” So much for her not being too pushy.

“No Kat.” Trixie couldn’t bare the thought of Katya knowing everything, why would she want to be with a dumb kid living in a motel cause they got kicked out by their parents? But then again why would she want to be with Trixie like she is now, distant and moody?

“I need to go home.” She sat up abruptly after making her choice. She knew she wanted to be here with Katya she knew that she should just talk to her. She wasn’t going to do that though. No she was going to be stupid and try and walk back to her motel where she could curl up on her sheets like her first night there, only this time when she cried it wouldn’t be about her mom throwing her out, this time it’d be over how she fucked up the only good thing currently in her life.

“Are you sure? You can stay here for a while you don’t have to talk about anything. I promise!” Katya was aware she was coming off as desperate as she sat up grabbing hold of her wrist, she looked at Trixie her eyes desperate she almost thought for a moment that she would stay until she pulled her hand away getting up off the bed.

“Katya I need to go.” Trixie couldn’t look at her. She knew if she did she would get straight back in that bed and stay there, probably forever or at least for as long as Katya would have her. She had made her choice she would get herself away from Katya. That was what was best. It really was. She would take her messes along with her instead of burdening Katya with them, she had her club she didn’t need Trixie's stupid little problems in her life, she deserved someone who didn’t sob the morning after in the shower with her then refuse to talk about it. Someone good.

“Trix, baby.” Trixie stopped putting her clothes on from yesterday for a moment at the name, but only for a moment she wouldn’t let some silly pet name break her. “Trixie don't go, you’re upset you shouldn’t have to feel like this by yourself.” Katya hated the thought of Trixie so sad on her own when she could be here cuddled up with her.

“No. I need to go home, i-i’m sorry I just gotta go.” Trixie grabbed the remains of her things before almost running from Katya's bedroom out her front door before she could hear anything else she had to stay.

She was grateful for google maps, she would of been completely lost without it. She hadn’t really explored L.A. yet so storming out of Katya's house probably wasn’t her smartest idea, she felt like shit Katya had only been trying to help her. She thought about how much she overreacted the thought of facing her after that made Trixie want to crawl in a hole and never come out again. Just another thing to add to the list of reasons she just needed to let Katya go.

It was far from a short walk back to her motel, it probably would’ve taken less time had she not been dragging her feet the entire way back. There were a few times she considered turning round and going back to Katya's all she had to do was suck up her pride and go back, it wasn’t like she would turn her away she knew the constant buzzing of her phone was Katya trying to check up on her. Trixie had never felt so guilty but she knew it was best, maybe not for her but it was for Katya and that’s what mattered to her most.

She lay on the bed in her room curtains shut in the middle of the afternoon having her own little pity party with her phone in her hand wondering whether or not it was a good idea to look at Katya's messages. Of course she ended up looking she was only human.

_(21 missed messages)_

**_Katya (11:37):_ **

_Trix?_

_Baby come back please.._

_**Katya (11:49):** _

_Trixie are you there?_

_I’m worried_

_Do you know where you’re going?_

**_Katya (11:56):_ **

_At least let me come find you and drive you back._

**_Katya (12:04):_ **

_Please tell me you aren’t ignoring me_

_Or that you’re okay_

_Fuck Trixie just one word okay don’t fucking leave me here worrying!_

**_Katya (12:06):_ **

_I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean that.._

_I’m just worried you get that right._

**_Katya (12:16):_ **

_I hope it’s not me that caused this_

_I’m so sorry if it was_

_You would tell me if it was?_

**_Katya (12:20):_ **

_Right Trix?_

_If it was I know I don’t deserve it but just tell me you’re home safe_

**_Katya (12:23):_ **

_Promise me you will Trix Okay?_

_I should know you’re not gonna answer_

**_Katya (12:37):_ **

_I’m sorry for all these messages._

**_Katya (12:53):_ **

_I love you..._

 

Trixie let her phone slip from her hands down to the bed below her, the words just staring up at her, taunting her, she couldn’t cope. There were tears just falling down her face, she didn’t even feel as if she was crying it was almost as if the tears that fell were natural no sound came from her mouth. She just lay there staring at the three words that almost broke her.

She blocked her number.

This was what was best, she told herself to ignore her own her she didn’t need to think about herself, she didn’t deserve to not after everything she had just done. She deserved this. She tried to shower again that night she didn’t know if she wanted to wash the smell of Katya off of her skin, or just try and remember how her hands felt in her hair and on her body. It didn’t work instead she ended up sat on the floor of a shower that definitely wasn’t clean crying again. She had managed to go most of the night without instead she just felt her whole body was consumed by numbness. It hadn’t hit her until now that she probably wasn’t going to see Katya again if she stuck to her plan, she didn’t exactly know how she would fight the urge to go crawling back to her.

She had managed to pull herself from the shower and back to bed, not bothering to dry herself off or get dressed. She didn’t want to do more than the bare minimum, it felt like she was missing a part of her now that Katya was gone. Trixie was back to how she felt the day she was kicked out before she met Katya only now it was so much worse, she had finally understood what people were talking about when they spoke about soulmates and all the other things Trixie just labelled as cheesy shit. She couldn’t help but feel so drawn to Katya and her crazy sense of humour, the way she always called her Tracy, how it felt to be held by her and how strong and sexy her body was especially when she danced or when she came undone under Trixie's hands. She cursed herself for thinking about the night before again, she needed to stop before she broke her agreement with herself in less that 12 hours. She knew she had to try to stop thinking about Katya and she knew she couldn’t get drunk no matter how appealing it sounded, it would only end with her begging Katya to touch her again whether it would be innocent or not she didn’t know.

Trixie stopped showing up to work. She ignored Dans texts asking where both her and Katya were, reading them felt like a punch in the gut. Was it her fault Katya wasn’t showing up either? That was her club she knew how passionate Katya was about it had she really not shown up for three days? She had never felt so guilty this was entirely her fault, she knew this meant she should call Katya at least text her and explain but if she couldn’t bring herself to face her before she definitely couldn’t now.

She had built Katya up so much, she had flirted and teased her without even thinking about it she had clearly deluded herself into thinking she was good enough to be with her. This was proof that she wasn’t. Then she just left hurting the one person she cared the most about, Trixie had never felt worse but this was all her own doing.

Katya didn’t stay away from work for long, Dan had sent Trixie various messages still asking where she was when Katya had returned to work four days later. She was glad that she hadn’t stayed away from the club for too long meanwhile she had just sat refusing to leave her motel room for the entire week. Trixie felt like a pathetic girl who had just been dumped and stalked her ex’s facebook only instead she had never actually dated Katya and she just waited for Dan to message her hoping it would tell her how Katya was doing better than before. It never did. In fact he was often asking what had happened between the two of them to cause Katya to lose her quirky self or what made Trixie stop showing up all together.

_(2 unread messages)_

**_Dan (17:56):_ **

_Trixie, it’s been 3 weeks Katya's hired a new waitress._

_Come back to the club whenever but you’re gonna have to look for a new job._

_She didn’t know why she felt so hurt read that, she’d been gone with absolutely no contact what was she expecting. She hated that this meant Katya had finally moved on this is what she thought was best. So deep down why did it all feel so wrong?_

**_To Dan (18:11):_ **

_I fucked up._

**_Dan (18:14):_ **

_Well if it isn’t Trixie herself replying to someone, what the hell did you do?_

**_To Dan (18:17):_ **

_Dan this is serious I ran off the morning after I slept with her, she can’t know about everything._

_The only reason you know is cause I was so fucking drunk_

**_Dan (18:19):_ **

_Trixie Mattel you are the biggest idiot I know_

_Do you really think she would be bothered by it?_

_If so you’re stupider than I thought you were_

**_To Dan (18:25):_ **

_Dan I couldn’t look her in the eye again after this I’m such an idiot_

**_Dan (18:26):_ **

_Glad we agree on something then, send me your address i’m coming over later with drinks and we are gonna sort this shit._

_I am not having you wallowing around for any longer and if Katya doesn’t go back to her weird ass self soon everyone at this club is gonna go insane._

 

She sent Dan her address without even thinking, he thought she lived in some cheap apartment and there was no way she could make this look even remotely like a place someone should be living long term. Then he would know absolutely everything about her, she considered texting him telling him not to come but she knew that he would anyway and if anything the thought of alcohol did sound appealing.

Trixie tried her best to make the place look presentable, she had managed to make it seem that someone hadn’t spent the past three weeks just wallowing in self pity. The woman who ran the motel had given her a funny look when she emerged from her room considering she had stayed in there almost 24/7 instead of when she had to go pay more money, that she didn’t really have enough after not working, for her room. It had taken her around two hours to get the place presentable, it probably wasn’t even worth half of the effort she put in all anyone would need to do was look at the outside and they would know what kind of place she was living in.

Trixie looked herself in the bathroom mirror feeling disgusted at who looked back at her, this wasn’t her. Trixie loved to look clean, pretty and like on overgrown barbie doll and she looked like none of that. She hadn’t showered in longer than anyone would’ve like she only ever did when it was completely necessary. She would just break down into tears every time she stepped foot into it.

She managed to hold back the tears this time, she thought about how she might have a chance to sort things with Katya after she had been such an idiot but the thought of facing her still made Trixie feel nauseous. She doubted that Katya would want her anymore but she would be able to explain everything to her maybe, if she was lucky, even get a friendship with her. Not that she knew how she would cope with that, she couldn’t imagine just being friends with Katya. ‘God you’re like a teenage girl’ she scolded herself and tried to focus her attention on shaving and trying to get the knots untangled from her hair. Trixie was only just realising how much she had really let herself go. At least she still had a while until Dan got there, she guessed he would be getting there around 12 after his shift ended which left her with another 3 hours to kill.

The time had never passed so slowly as she lay staring at the door fiddling with the corner of her phone case, pushing it back and forth to the point the plastic case had a small break in it. She hated to look at that Trixie had always liked things to be perfect so this definitely wasn’t helping her nerves. She was jumping at the slightest of sounds hoping they weren’t Dan she didn’t want him to know the truth about everything she wished she could’ve thought before she sent him her address _‘idiot you’re an idiot Trixie Mattel’_ she couldn’t shake the thoughts as her breathing started to quicken. It wasn’t just Dan that would know, soon he would tell Katya or she would have to tell her she didn’t want the inevitable looks of pity on their faces that made her feel like a 5 year old girl who had lost her barbie.

If there was ever a worse time for there to be someone frantically knocking on her door she would be shocked, she didn’t think Dan would be showing up for at least another half an hour.

“J-just coming, just like um give me a sec-second!” She managed to choke out as she tried even harder to pull herself together.

“Trixie? Trix you okay in there?” That definitely wasn’t Dan. Because last time she checked Dan and Katya didn’t have the same voice.

“No no no no no no…” Trixie wasn’t even sure if what she saying sounded like anything more than incoherent mumbles, Katya couldn’t be here right now she just couldn’t. “Kat, no no Kat you can’t be here you just c-can’t.”

“Trixie! Baby let me in!” Katya was rattling the door handle Trixie knew she could hear her short breaths and the panicked tone in her voice. “Please baby let me in, I don’t want you to be alone.” She barely heard her last words but she was glad she did as they were what made her stand up on her shaky legs to walk over and unlock the door to find a stressed looking Katya.

Trixie had barely managed to whine out a small _‘Kaaat’_ before the arms she'd been trying to forget for almost a month were wrapped tightly around her neck holding her close as she leant forward to cry into Katya's neck. Trixie had found her arms squeezing tight around Katya's waist as her hand stroked through her hair again whispering words of encouragement into her hair.

“Shhh i’m here now baby it’s okay.” She started to walk them back towards the bed kicking the door shut as she did, “Trix you’re alright now don’t push me away again baby, let me look after you.” Katya was now lying on top of the uncomfortable mattress Trixie laying on top of her. She had calmed down a lot now, only the occasional sniffle could be heard. “I missed you Trix…” Katya had a single tear rolling down her cheek as she mumbled the words into the younger girls hair.


End file.
